Life with five boys is a whirlwind of energy, laughter, and constant motion. It’s a joyful chaos, and as a super-organized mom, I’ve developed a well-oiled system to keep everything on track, especially when it comes to school and extracurricular activities. In this blog post, I want to share my strategies and insights for managing the schedules, logistics, and the occasional chaos that comes with raising five active boys while ensuring their success in school and extracurricular pursuits.
The Power of Planning
Planning is one of the most valuable skills sets I have, and I use it more at home than I do in my professional career! Here are some of the top planning strategies I use:
Centralized Family Calendar
My secret weapon for staying organized is a centralized family calendar. I use a white board, hung right on our kitchen wall, for all our appointments, school events, activities, and important dates. It’s color-coded by activity type, making it easy to track who needs to be where and when (the color coding system changes with seasons and activities!):
- Blue: School and medical activities for the boys – signifies Mom’s in charge of making sure they are prepared for, or attend, these commitments.
- Green: Baseball practices – signifies mom and Papi need to know these details and it involves loading a ton of equipment into trunks!
- Black: Baseball games, major events – signifies that Mom and Papi are BOTH equally responsible, and Papi really needs to pay attention to make sure the boys are prepared for and arrive with everything they need.
- Purple: Mom’s stuff – signifies my doctor appts, errands or tasks I need to manage, or household things I need to schedule
- Pink: Celebrations – signifies birthday’s, parties, family big events, etc. Everyone loves seeing pink on the calendar (and it’s my favorite color!)
Monthly and Weekly Planning
I like to look at each month for the big strategy. Is it back to school time? Gearing up for Summer break? Holiday season? Knowing the big goals for the month helps me to prioritize what I need to do weekly, and the activities we need to squeeze in, to be successful for the month. Each of these items are then added to the centralized family calendar.
I also engage in weekly planning. Every Sunday, I find time to sneak away for a quick weekly planning session. I review what’s happening in the upcoming week, coordinate schedules, and allocate responsibilities. This is where I look to see if we can squeeze in a family outing, or a play date with friends to add a bit more flexible fun into our structured activities. This too get’s added to the centralized family calendar.
Meal Planning
I then use our weekly plan to do our weekly meal planning. Early morning activities? Ok, we have cereal for breakfast. A lazy morning in? Pancakes it is! Baseball practice starting at 5? Car picnic with sandwiches and chips are jotted down for dinner. A full evening at home without interruption? Big taco spread or a BBQ in the backyard is put on the meal plan. Everything is coordinated, orchestrated, and perfectly thought out. This allows us to maximize our family time and still make it to all of our scheduled activities.
Keeping it All Together
My secret weapon here is the Chaos Planner (Amazon Link)… no I mean the actual planner! I specifically designed the layout and content of this planner to follow what I ACTUALLY do. I have found a system that really works, from planning our month, down to our week, and then our meal plan!
Streamlining Routines
With five boys to get ready each time we do anything, a streamlined routine is essential. I’ve already written about our morning routine, which goes so smoothly (considering we’re severely outnumbered), so I’ll focus now on the other routines I need to manage.
Bedtime Routine
Our bedtime routine is flexible to start, then slowly merges into a tightly controlled lights out times. In the evenings, we are open to plying outside, having a movie night, playing boardgames, or whatever else the boys want to do. And we do it as a family from 6:00pm on. The only requirements are that Jack (1.5) goes down at 7:30pm, Mateo (5) at 8:00pm, Jasper and Matthew (both 7) hit the sack at8:30pm and MJ (10) be in bed by 9:00pm.
While having strict bedtimes may seem hard to control, it’s the control that actually makes it all work. We don’t falter, so the boys don’t question us or push back when we tell them it’s bedtime. And staggering the times by age allows me to give each child their special time before bed.
I rock Jack from 7:30 to 7:45, I snuggle or play with Mateo from 7:45 to 8, I take turns chatting or snuggling with Matthew and Jasper from 8 to 8:30, and I invest a full 30 minutes with MJ from 8:30 to 9 since he’s older and this is an amazing window into his world, a time that he is so open to sharing his life with me.
And the best part is that each child gets tucked in, good night kisses and all the I love you’s they can stomach in the warmth of their bed. Oh, and of course this is Mama’s favorite part too; I never want this season to end!
The Car Routine
Another big routine we follow is what I like to call, “The Car Routine”. Whether it’s going to baseball, an hour drive to an adventure, or a 5 hour trek across the country by plane, we always follow the same exact routine for getting ready and out the door. The boys are responsible for 5 things (similar to the morning routine!).
- Clean up – Any toys left out in the playroom, or items on your bedroom floor have to get picked up before we leave. I LOVE coming home to a clean house after a long day!
- Go potty – I don’t care if the ride is 5 minutes, you have to go!
- Pick a book – Yes, we take books on every single drive. In another post I have already explained how our active lifestyle promotes reading.
- Fill up your water bottle – Other than Jack, each of the boys knows how to open, empty, fill and close their own water bottle. (This is our favorite one!). While it may be faster for me to do it, teaching them to do it themselves gives me time to pack up the baby, the snacks, the gear, or anything else I need to take care of, and takes one more thing off my plate.
- Get in and buckle up – Again, other than Jack, each of the boys is responsible for taking their book, their water bottle, and anything else they need and getting themselves into the van and bucking into their seats.
Time Management
I’ve written about time management a few times now in my Productivity Hacks and Building EverGrove articles. And of course it fits in here too!
Time Blocking
Time blocking isn’t just for your professional life! I use time blocking to allocate specific chunks of time for the priorities each day. I keep another whiteboard on our fridge and encourage the boys to read it so they understand what we have planned. Each day has a block for what the after-school activity is (either a hike, or just playing at home), what dinner we are having, what our family time activity is (sometimes a baseball game takes this spot, or we go for a family bike ride). This strategy helps our boys develop time management skills and ensures they have adequate time for transitions by knowing what comes next.
Delegation, Expectations and Responsibilities
When you think of time management, you usually think of ways to better manage your own time. But with 5 boys, I had to really focus on getting better at offloading and helping them better manage THEIR time as well. Is it faster for me to fill water bottles before leaving the house? Yes! Do I do a better job cleaning up their toys and rooms? Oh 100%!
But, by delegating the jobs they are capable of doing to them, it allows me to focus on the things they can’t do, it sets the expectation that they too are part of the family, and it ensures they understand their responsibility in their roles. It helps me do my job better and helps them grow into better men… it’s a win all around!
Extracurricular Extravaganza
While it’s tempting to enroll our boys in a multitude of extracurricular activities, we prioritize quality over quantity. Each child selects one or two activities that align with their interests and talents to ensure they have time for both learning and leisure. This past season, all 4 of the “bigs” played baseball, and that’s all we could fit in. But, they were at every practice and every game which allowed us to see HUGE gains in their skill and also love for the sport. Sometimes, you have to make trade offs so you can truly commit to doing the things you love well.
Open Communication
The best part of having the centralized family calendar and schedules in plain sight for the boys, is getting their involvement and feedback on the schedules and activities we have planned. They not only get to provide input on the activities we choose, but they get to voice their opinions when their needs aren’t being met by what we are doing.
We also foster open communication with everyone involved in the boys’ schedules. I make it a point to establish well respected relationships with their teachers through volunteering in their classrooms and actively participating in events and conferences. I also put great effort into showing appreciation to their coaches, offering to bring snacks, or finding other ways to be involved with their sports and activities. Because of these genuine relationships, these coaches and teaches are extremely open and are eager to share. They tell us where the boys are accelerating or where they need additional support.
Flexibility and Adaptation
Flexibility is key in our super-organized household. We understand that unexpected events and changes to plans are a part of life. And they happen constantly, so we adapt accordingly. This is why the whiteboards in the kitchen are key. They are super easy to erase and change as soon as a change is imminent, again giving the boys a heads up of the change whenever possible.
I also like to use our family data to assess how the schedule is going and adapt to any areas that aren’t going well and need updating. While a journal is a great place to vent strong emotions or document the funny stories that will one day become memories, it’s also a great place to jot down when something worked well or was a complete disaster. Learning from those disasters and updating the family strategies allows us to continuously improve how Papi and I perform and continuously support the boys’ needs. I designed the Chaos Journal (Amazon Link) for exactly this reason!
The Impact of Organization
Navigating school and extracurricular activities for five boys requires meticulous planning, effective time management, and a commitment to open communication. While it can be challenging, our super-organized approach has allowed us to provide our boys with the support and structure they need to excel in their academic and extracurricular pursuits. It’s a balancing act that keeps our household running smoothly and ensures that our boys have the opportunity to thrive in all aspects of their lives.
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